Jimmy Carr Girlfriend, Wife, Net Worth, Height, Is He Gay?

Popular for his heckler interaction, dark humour, and deadpan delivery, Jimmy Carr is an English actor, presenter, writer, and stand-up comedian who went into comedy fully in 2000.

After establishing himself as a stand-up comedian, he began appearing on a number of TV shows aired on Channel 4, including  on the history and theory of joke-telling.

Is Jimmy Carr Gay…….?

Is Jimmy Carr Gay.......?

Jimmy Carr ‚ignored‘ mother’s plea to remove Down’s Syndrome joke from routine

Jimmy Carr has been accused of misleading the public after he dismissed outrage at a joke he made about Down’s syndrome, saying that nobody had complained before.

When Jimmy Carr caused controversy by telling an offensive joke about Down’s syndrome children, he launched a robust defence.

„It was the 238th gig of the tour and nobody has complained so far,“ he said by way of explanation.

A mother of a child with Down’s syndrome complained about the joke almost a year ago – and was completely ignored by Carr’s management team, who didn’t bother to reply to her heartfelt pleas for the joke to be removed from his stage show. Her complaint was even taken up by the Down’s Syndrome Association but that went unanswered too.

Adele Joicey, whose two-year-old daughter Esme has Down’s Syndrome, said: „I did everything I could to get a response and he ignored me. I just wanted him to remove one joke from his routine so I wrote him an emotive letter.

„But he treated me with contempt. I took offence at his joke but he made it worse by never, ever replying. He never had the decency to respond. I didn’t ask for an apology, I just asked for him to reconsider.“

Miss Joicey, a communications manager with an NHS trust, was deeply upset by the joke about disabled children told by Carr towards the end of his Laughter Therapy Live show at Newcastle City Hall in November last year.

The performance was ironically Miss Joicey’s first night out since Esme was diagnosed with Down’s Syndrome following a genetic test.

She had felt depressed for a year since the diagnosis and Carr’s show – she had seen him on television – was supposed to cheer her up.

„I just sat there sobbing. I was really upset. I wanted to get up and run to the front and shout: ‚Shame on you‘,“ recalled Miss Joicey.

Carr’s joke – “ Why are they called Sunshine Variety coaches when all the kids on them look the ****ing same?“ – finally sparked outrage last week following a performance at the Parr Hall theatre in Warrington, Cheshire.

Sunshine Variety coaches – 5,000 of which have been bought with money raised by community groups and corporate donations – are used to take disadvantaged and disabled children on outings.

The furore prompted Carr, best known as the host of the Channel 4 television programme 8 Out of 10 Cats, to defend the joke by claiming nobody had previously complained after 238 performances, adding: „I’m sorry to anyone who came and was offended.“.

Only a few days before Carr had said in an interview that there are no taboo areas, adding: „I think anyone can talk about anything, anything’s kind of up for grabs.“

Miss Joicey, 37, from Newcastle, wrote the letter to Carr in January this year, having spent a month agonising over its precise wording.

She sent a subsequent letter – and that too was ignored. She also contacted the Down’s Syndrome Association who confirmed they were writing to the comic to protest about the joke.

The association never received a reply either, said Miss Joicey. She even contacted her local newspaper who then approached Carr for a comment. None was forthcoming and the story was never published.

The correspondence was emailed to Chambers Management, the entertainment agency which manages Carr as well as other entertainers including another controversial comic, Frankie Boyle.

On the company’s website, the public is encouraged to get in touch. „We would love to hear from you,“ the website says, adding: „whether you want more information on any of our acts or wish to discover how our artists can support your event.“

In her email to Chambers Management on January 18, Miss Joicey wrote: „When the joke was told I felt physically sick.

„I became very upset. What I couldn’t believe was the humiliation of listening to a whole auditorium laugh at such an awful joke about such a terrible disability.

„It confirmed my fears that society has not changed, it is not accepting of disability and my daughter will have to face a life of ridicule and jokes at her expense.

„Of course I understand in this politically-correct age it is harder and harder for comedians to tell jokes and make a living. However I wanted to appeal to him that this type of joke about disability cuts those that are affected too deeply.

„Esme’s disability is something I will have to live with until the day I die. I just wanted to say jokes about disability affect a minority of society, but to those it does affect, it hurts, a lot.

„I wanted to appeal and respectfully request that in future no further jokes be made concerning Down’s Syndrome, or indeed any learning disability, as jokes of this nature only serve to increase the stigma that we already face.“

Xanthe Breen, of the Down’s Syndrome Association, said she also forwarded Miss Joicey’s letter by post to Carr’s management team but had had no response.

The charity had received a number of complaints about the joke in the past year and had advised people to write to Chambers Management. It is not clear how many then did so.

Ms Breen said: “I have passed on Carr’s management details to more than one person. He cannot say there have not been any complaints.

“We just want comedians to stop picking on people with learning difficulties. They are not allowed to make racist jokes and they cannot make jokes about gay people, so people with learning difficulties are the new group being ridiculed.”

Jimmy Carr 'ignored' mother's plea to remove Down's Syndrome joke from routine

Alan Carr: ‚Being this camp has made me a lot of money‘

The funny thing is, he says, he’s spent so much of his life trying to de-camp himself. He’d try to play football or deepen his voice, but there was always a little something that gave him away – the obsession with Wonder Woman, the laugh, the limp wrist, the love of Doris Day filmsRock Hudson.

His father, Graham, had hoped Carr would be a footballer – after all, he’d been a footballer and manager, and his granddad had been a footballer, so there was a sense of inevitability. Was it a macho family? „Yeah, definitely. And that was just my mother. Heeheeheeeheee!“ The comedian’s got a lovely cackle.

As a young boy, he’d follow his dad to matches, kick the ball about because he was expected to, and when he got to middle school the games teacher proudly announced to the rest of his class that they were lucky enough to be in the presence of the son of the great Northampton manager Graham Carr, and that of course Alan would instantly be made team captain. He laugh-shudders as he tells the story. „I was absolute crap. Scared of the ball. Absolutely terrified.“ What was he like back then? „Mincey. I’ve always been mincey. People think I put it on, but I don’t. I’ve always been the same. When Mr Jenkins, the PE teacher, said we’d like you to be team captain, I was, like, ‚Ooh no, I’m fine, please don’t, it’s fine.'“ Mr Jenkins ignored him, but Carr was soon found out.

It was around this time that Carr got confused with life. He’d always been a confident kid, but as he limped into puberty he became baffled by his body and his emotions. While the other boys at school started to talk with a deeper voice, his remained stubbornly squeaky. When they started going out with girls, he began to realise it was boys he fancied – or, at best, girls who looked like boys. It wasn’t a happy time, he says. He withdrew, became a loner, the kind of boy who hung around dinner ladies. He’d been popular until then – always having girls back at his house, playing girly games. But suddenly nobody wanted to know. „Girls don’t want to hang around boys talking about The Golden Girls. They want a boyfriend who turns up on a motorbike, don’t they? They don’t want me going, ‚Hey, let’s skip!‘ And boys don’t want to hang around you coz you’re effeminate.“

By the time he was 16, he started to come out of himself. Yes, he might have stood out („I think I was the only gay in the school“), but his sexuality hardly made him unique. He began to explore the world, find a place for himself, enjoy life again.

We meet at a restaurant in Soho, where Carr tucks into his food with gusto – ham hock, then salmon and finished off with chocolate and pistachio tart. „Ooh, I love my food,“ he says. „Do you know I’m clinically obese?“ Unlike many comedians, he’s naturally funny – no shtick, no routine, not even much by way of neurosis. That’s why I like his chat show – he doesn’t try too hard, doesn’t overwhelm his guests with his wit or cleverness, doesn’t use them as pawns. His show is called Chatty Man, which is a good title for Carr. He might not be a Parkinson or Frost, but he is a good chatter, and a surprisingly good listener.

Carr studied drama at Middlesex university. He was desperate to play the great classic roles at the National, but he couldn’t get on to the acting course and had to make do with drama and theatre studies. „You basically just ended up wearing a black body stocking moving furniture around when the lights went down.“ Teachers told him that he didn’t have the range to be a successful actor, and he didn’t know what they meant until he saw a video of himself in action. „I got the shock of my life when I saw myself.“ Like many of the great old-time comedians (Tommy Cooper, say), Carr has got a comical face; gappy teeth, big specs, scrawny hair, bewildered expression. First, there was the voice: Carr does an unforgiving impression of himself – all squeals and squeaks, and nail-on-blackboard shrillness. He didn’t know what he sounded like until he watched himself perform? „No, I didn’t have any idea. It was like somebody had punched me in the stomach. So that’s why people are shouting ‚Bender?'“

Then there was the posture. Even when he was just standing in the background, saying nothing, he was ridiculously camp – no matter the role. „I thought, right, I’m going to be straight now. But you can’t. I was in Edward Bond’s Saved, and I had to stone the baby and, because I can’t throw, the stones kept missing the pram. I could see people moving their handbags and covering their face. It was awful. The next night they said you can’t have any stones.“

Was he always funny? Well, yes, he says, but not intentionally. „At school people laughed at me, not with me.“ He doesn’t mean cruelly – just that the way things came out were, well, funny. „I’d walk into a room and be, like, ‚Oh hello! I’m here for history,‘ and people would laugh. I never told a joke, people just found me quite comical.“ He decided to make the most of it, applied to do the stand-up comedy module at university, and loved it.

But when he left university, there was nothing out there for him in drama or comedy. So his dad helped him find jobs in call centres and factories that made shampoo and pressed CDs. „I preferred factory work. At least you could disappear with your broom to sweep up the CD scraps. There was one job where I had to wipe grease off car parts with meths. I tell you what, by afternoon I was dancing along to the radio. Giggling. Then I’d leave work and have this blinding headache.“

The places he worked were rough and, often, homophobic. He tried to man up, but failed miserably. „It was so macho. This man came in and said, ‚My fucking wife’s having an affair, this fucking cunt who owns this pub, I want to smash it up, are you in guys?‘ And everyone went, ‚Yeah!‘ And I went [he squeals uncertainly], ‚Yeah!‘ I didn’t turn up. They all went and smashed up the pub with baseball bats. I couldn’t do it. It’s not in my nature.“

In his early 20s Carr moved to Manchester and focused on stand-up. By 2001 he had won the BBC New Comedy Award, and by 2005 he was co-hosting The Friday Night Project with Justin Lee Collins on C4. He says it was so exciting early on, travelling around from city to city, getting paid to make people laugh – a great way of being young. Were there loads of groupies? „Oh yeah, the male ones.“ He corrects himself. „No, not the male ones, the heterosexual ones – you get gag hags, women who shag comedians. Gay men don’t really go to comedy clubs.“

Isn’t the world of comedy fantastically competitive? He grins. „‚D’you find that funny? D’you think I’m funny? Was that funny?‘ They’re like that all the time. I know comedians who will say something to you, and then they’ll be like, ‚What was funny about what I just said? Was it because I said this word?‘ There’s one I know who brings out a tape recorder.“

„It’s Jimmy Carr, isn’t it?“ I say, total guess. He bursts out laughing. „It is. It is Jimmy Carr. I’m not bad-mouthing Jimmy, but he’s always on tour. I find it so lonely, but he loves it. Just as he finishes another tour, he’s off again.“ Touring can be amazing, he says – you go on stage, feeling a bit down, and are lifted by a great audience. But it can also work the other way. You come off stage at 10.30pm, and you don’t physically come down – adrenaline until about 2am. „And you’re sitting there, in Bolton or Cardiff or Barrow-in-Furness, and you’re there by yourself, and it’s just the weirdest thing. You can see why some of these old school comedians like Tommy Cooper just used to sit there and drink. It killed him in the end. I like a drink, but not to excess.“

When he started out, he had this vision of driving round in a van with a bunch of comedians, all of them laughing themselves silly. And it was like that for a while, but it soon changed. „It was so intense. Have you ever been to the Comedy Store? Oh my God, everybody’s watching it on the screen [backstage] – ‚Well, that’s died a death, hasn’t it?‘ and ‚Oh my God! That material’s awful. It’s so hack.‘ And then they come back and people say, ‚Hi! That was really good!‘ And you know you’re going on next …“

Did he ever take part in that mega bitching? „No, but I can see it happening if it all goes tits up! Some of the older comedians, whose time has passed, they can be a little bit bitter.“

Who’s the most screwed up comedian he’s ever met? „Oh shut up, I’m not saying that.“ But he does anyway. „I supported Roseanne Barr in Leicester. I went to meet her and the man whispered to me, ‚Miss Barr does not do hands.‘ I mean, fuck off! And she had her whole act on the autocue. ‚Hello-Leicester-I-Am-Roseanne Barr.‘ It was, like, loosen up.“

The thing is, he says, all these dysfunctional comedians have such fascinating lives. „I was thinking the other day about me. It’s a bit frustrating that I don’t have these inner demons, because it would be my dream to have someone act out my life on BBC4 in about 20 years – like they have done with Hattie Jacques or Frankie Howerd or Kenneth Williams – but it would be just somebody walking a red setter round a park going, ‚Ooh, that’s nice!'“

Ah, you poor thing, I say, perhaps you’re just too shallow for demons. „You know, I never saw it like that. It’s true, I don’t let things get to me. Heeeheeeheeeheee! Oh, that’s awful. I’m ‚too shallow for demons.'“

At 35, he says he’s got the perfect balance – the TV show, touring when he wants, and a long-term relationship with his partner Paul. They live together in west London with their two dogs. „I’ve become such a gay stereotype,“ he says. „They’re both red setters. At least they’re big dogs. You’d expect a chihuahua to poke out of a cerise bum bag. ‚Come on, Judy and Lisa!'“

They’re not really called Judy and Lisa? „They’re actually called Bev and Joyce. Bev coz she looks a bit like Beverley Callard from Coronation Street.“

The other day, he says, he was in the park with Bev and Joyce when fellow comic and TV chat show host Graham Norton walked in from the opposite end with his two dogs. „His dog ‚ggrrrrrs‘ at Bev, and Bev goes ‚ggggrrraaah‘ If there was a pap, they’d have taken a picture: it was like celebrity gay dog fight! I was holding him back. But actually I know Graham and he’s lovely.“

Why does he think so many chat-show hosts are gay? „I think TV in general is camp. X Factor is camp, Strictly Come Dancing is camp. Basically, an orange man comes down some stairs and waves at the camera. People are drawn to that.“

He flicks through the pictures on his phone, looking for the photo that was taken of him for this shoot. „Oh look, there’s me as the Queen.“ He giggles, approvingly. „I think I look like Liz Taylor.“

A while ago Carr said that many gay men can’t stand him. What did he mean by that? „I was in a bad mood. They slagged me off a bit. I made a mistake because I mistook militant gays for the normal gays. It’s just militant gays I can’t stand.“ OK, he says, he’ll give me an example. „I saw something in a magazine the other day that said, ‚Is Alan Carr too gay?‘ I felt a bit like Frankenstein’s monster. What have we created?“ Critics say he’s a throwback to an age when homosexuals on TV had to be caricatures, and that he’s unrepresentative of most contemporary gay men. The trouble is, Carr says, that’s what he’s like – and he can’t do anything about it.

Now I’m flicking through his phone. I come across a photograph of Paul, with whom he has been for four years. „He used to work in catering, but he doesn’t need to now. He’s a kept man.“ Does he remind him all the time? „Yeah, I’m a real bitch, and I say basically he’s like a ‚manny‘ for my two red setters. And he’s 40. So basically I’m not only the bread winner, I’m also the toy boy. He’s a cradle snatcher!“ He bursts out laughing.

Actually, Paul looks in better nick than him. I tell Carr that when I last saw him on television, I thought he’d had a makeover – a posh new set of teeth, a new head of hair. „Give over!“ he squeals. „My hair done? Have you seen it? Look at it. You know what, it breaks my heart when I watch the video of the Tooth Fairy Live in 2007. What happened to me? I’m just a husk of a man. My hair’s thinning, I’ve got fatter.“ And the teeth? „I do have a polish, but in the world of entertainment having a bit of scale and polish is nothing.“

All in all, he says, he’s a pretty poor specimen of a man. He’s got a dodgy knee, and there’s worse. „I went to this physiotherapist and he says I’ve got gluteal amnesia, whereby my arse has forgotten how to work because my thighs are so strong they do all the work.“ I look at him disbelievingly. „You look it up! Gluteal amnesia.“ So your bottom has got no memory? „Yeah, it walks into rooms and goes, ‚Why did I come in here?‘ Heeheeeheeehee!“

But the militant gays and thinning hair and gluteal amnesia are small gripes. „I wouldn’t change myself for the world,“ he says. „It’s made me a lot of money, being this camp.“

I’m still flicking through his pictures. All his life seems to be documented in this phone. There’s his mum, and his lovely little niece, and the red setters in the park. He starts to panic. „Don’t touch it because there’s quite an embarrassing photo.“ Too late. Just as he warns me, I’m confronted by a transsexual with a huge penis. „Someone sent me a photo of a tranny,“ he says, sheepishly.

„I don’t know. Heeheheeheeee! There’s a better one. See what you think of this other one.“ As we’re examining the picture of his prodigious tranny, the waitress appears with our dessert. „Stop it, you naughty little man.“ And now he’s in hysterics. „Don’t put that in the interview… They’ll think I’m a pervert.“

We put the phone down and change the subject. Has his father forgiven him for not being any good at football? „Ah, he’s so proud of me now. So proud. He came to see me at Birmingham NEC and it was just this massive stadium with a stage. At the end he went white as a ghost and said, ‚I didn’t know it was this big.‘ He’s mellowed out now, and he loves my Paul and everything.“

Carr says his life has changed since he became successful, and this has to be reflected in his act. Already, he says, writing is tougher now that he doesn’t have factories and call centres to draw on. „I don’t want to be one of those comedians who lie to their audience and go, ‚Oh God, don’t you bloody hate it when you can’t pay your council tax?‘ because I can pay it and I have a lovely life now. I don’t want to patronise my audience. I have a good life, but you just delve in other places.“ These days he’s more likely to talk about moving close to Hyde Park to give Joyce and Bev a better start in life.

He assumes that one day he will once again be consigned to obscurity; at best, occasionally recognised as the man who used to be Alan Carr. Does he think about it? „All the time… And Paul says, ‚Oh Alan, just chill out‘, and I’m like, ‚It’s going to end, it’s going to end.'“ Does it scare him? „Only from a financial point of view. I don’t want to go back to working in a call centre. When you’ve had six years of shit jobs, this is a blessing, this is a dream. I love it, I genuinely do. And when it’s over, it’s over. I’m just going to go away. I don’t want to be on the telly just for the sake of it. I don’t want it that much.“ He pauses, and grins. „Cut to me in the jungle in a few weeks eating a crocodile cock. Heeeheeheehee!“

A new series of Chatty Man starts on Friday 27 April on Channel 4.

Alan Carr: 'Being this camp has made me a lot of money'

His Girlfriend, Wife – Is Jimmy Carr Gay?

Though already in his mid-forties, Jimmy Carr isn’t married and the talented Comedian has also said he isn’t gay. He has been in a relationship with girlfriend Karoline Copping since 2001.

His Canadian-born girlfriend is a commissioning editor for Channel 5, the couple met during an audition for a panel show during the early years in his career.

 His Girlfriend, Wife – Is Jimmy Carr Gay?

Is Jimmy Carr Gay? – Relationship

Though as of now in his mid-forties, Jimmy Carr isn’t hitched and the gifted Entertainer has likewise said he isn’t gay. He has been involved with sweetheart Karoline Copping since 2001.

His Canadian-conceived sweetheart is a charging supervisor for Channel 5, the couple met amid a tryout for a board appear amid the early years in his career.

20 Jokes That Didn’t Stop Netflix From Giving Jimmy Carr A Show

After much anticipation over a new show on Netflix featuring outrageous and hilarious comedian Jimmy Carr, “The Fix” finally premiered on Netflix last month. Sadly, the boundary-demolishing jokes that Carr became famous for were notably absent.

“The Fix” is a panel show featuring comedians gathered together to “fix” major problems facing the world. Carr is joined by four panelists who discuss topics such as immigration, guns, gentrification, poverty, the sexes’ wage gap, and global warming. You know, comedy stuff.

As you may have already guessed, the show is depressingly not funny and is just a showcase for woke comedians like Nikki Glaser, D.L. Hughley, and Sarah Schaefer to share their very left-wing political views while getting screen time on Netflix. To make absolutely sure the viewers know just how important, serious, and not funny the various topics are, midway through each episode a statistician name Mona reads some gasp-inducing and truly sad facts.

The show is an utterly pointless waste of a comedian as funny as Jimmy Carr, whom I have always held in high regard as the comedian who couldn’t give a d-mn about political correctness or solving world problems. He tells jokes to get laughs, and boy does he succeed. So why is Carr hosting this show?

It is actually quite odd that Netflix would have tapped such a controversial comedian to helm a show they clearly intended to be a safe-space-friendly, conversation-starting, lefty love fest. I mean, this is a guy who regularly jokes about pedophilia, rape, AIDS, and Islamic terrorists. Didn’t Kevin Hart just lose his Oscar-hosting gig and get condemned by the intersectional thought police for a few tweets and jokes about homosexuality from ten years ago?

Even after Hart’s most recent apology on “Ellen,” the people most outraged by his tweets show no signs of letting go of their grudge. It would be impossible to imagine Netflix offering Hart a show about how to fix the world.

Carr’s notoriety isn’t exactly a secret, either. The internet is awash with heavily shared compilation videos of the comic on stage telling his most “offensive” jokes. Listening to his fearless, often deranged sense of humor get roaring laughter in these videos makes his sanitized good guy image on “The Fix” all the more disappointing.

It is worth noting that several of the following jokes were taken from Carr’s special, “Funny Business,” which was produced by Netflix and is currently available for streaming. It seems his brand of politically incorrect material doesn’t have the same outrage-inducing effect as Louis C.K.’s and Hart’s. Yet.

Here are the top 20 Jimmy Carr jokes that should have caused the thought police to stop him from getting a show on Netflix. Warning: The following contains deeply offensive content. Seriously. Yes, they are jokes, but certainly not appropriate for all eyes and environments.

On Homosexuality

“People that adhere to political correctness are, in my opinion, retarded f-ggots. I can see some of you sitting in judgement, thinking, ‘Retarded f-ggots. That is an offensive phrase.’ But it’s not that offensive a phrase. Not when you compare it to my impersonation of… a retarded f-ggot. ‘I want a c-ck in me. I’m a really good bummer.’ That’s offensive. Compared to that, that phrase doesn’t seem as bad now, does it?”

“So gaydar is the voice in your head that, when you meet a gay guy, goes, ‘Oh, a gay guy.’ If you say out loud, ‘Bummer on the loose! Bummer on the loose!’ That is homophobia. Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Yeah, I just said that. Deal with it.”

“But, yeah, sometimes, it’s very difficult to know whether a woman is a lesbian or just a regular girl in a very bad mood. And if you’re a lesbian, and you didn’t find that funny, well, you’ve proved my point for me.”

“Of course, the big question, at the moment, globally, is ‘Should gay men be allowed to get married?’ And I’m a liberal. I say yes, as long as they find the right woman. I could have been gay. I failed the oral. Don’t neglect the balls. There’s a lesson.”

“Because of political correctness, you’re not meant to say ‘air hostess’ any more, are you? You’re meant to say, if it’s a woman, ‘sky waitress’, and if it’s a man, ‘homosexual.’ Doesn’t really change anything.

Is Jimmy Carr married?

Jimmy and long-term partner Karoline Copping have been dating since meeting in 2001.

While the couple have been together 19 years, the pair are not married.

Jimmy and Karoline are reported to have met at a television interview during auditions in 2001 where Karoline is a commissioning editor for Channel 5.

Jimmy confessed on Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs many years later that he didn’t make the best first impression with Karoline.

Jimmy said Karoline’s first impression was that Jimmy was a „one-note comedian with the eyes of a sex offender.“

However, Jimmy told the radio show it was love at first sight for him.

Best of the week’s news

The 8 Out of 10 Cats host, Jimmy Carr, finds himself strewn across the newspapers this week, as the most conspicuous face of a Jersey-based accountancy arrangement which squirrels £168m away from the Inland Revenue. Carr himself is said to be sheltering £3.3m of his earnings in the scheme, and paying only 1% of his income in tax. „Morally repugnant,“ said George Osborne of tax avoidance in his Budget speech earlier this year – but that’s unlikely to bother Carr, who’s been laughing off accusations of ethical bankruptcy for years.

It hasn’t done his standing in UK comedy much harm – as this week’s Top 100 list of the Most Influential People in Comedy is likely to establish. „Who runs our comedy industry,“ asked the panel who devised this power parade for the website Such Small Portions; „and who has the influence to inspire a generation of new comedians?“ So far, two-fifths of the list has been announced, and the Guardian’s Charlie Brooker’s place in the big ton is already secured …

Many of the names on that list will be behind this week’s announcements of new comedy programming on Channel 4 and BBC3. The former announced an August „Funny Fortnight“ featuring pilots from Vic and Bob (a new spoof gameshow called Lucky Sexy Winners), Frankie Boyle (The Boyle Variety Performance) and Peep Show’s Sam Bain and Jesse Armstrong (Bad Sugar, starring Olivia Coleman, Sharon Horgan and Julia Davis). Chortle reports, meanwhile, that „BBC Three has revealed the sort of comedy shows it wants to make in a document sent out to producers.“ According to the memo, „our top priority is to find a studio show with well-defined, original, likeable, youthful characters like Two Pints of Lager, IT Crowd or Big Bang Theory … [The] writing that should be ‚innovative, laugh-out-loud and edgy without being patronising of our audience‘.“ It also – and rather oddly – detailed three top-priority scenarios for new shows, which included a young woman discovering her father was a sperm donor, and two chalk-and-cheese brothers inheriting the family firm.

Elsewhere, we learn with a weary sense of inevitability that Russell Brand has been supporting the Dalai Lama on his UK tour. The spiritual leader is reported to have said of the self-adoring standup that „some people told me to listen to this strange person’s explanations … I was surprised but I think your openness is wonderful.“ Meanwhile, Edinburgh Comedy award champ 2010 Russell Kane has adopted his namesake Brand as a love-life role model, according to an interview in the Sun that will endear him to no one. „I’m going to try for a tour of duty,“ says Kane, „[and] do the stuff the other Russell is so good at. Look out ladies, I might look gay but I’m not!“

Our pick of this week’s Guardian comedy stories

Always the bridesmaid, never the bride – until now. BBC2 announce a new sketch show by comedy’s veteran right-hand man, Kevin Eldon

Times columnist Caitlin Moran has written the pilot for a Channel 4 sitcom about an overweight 16-year-old looking for a boyfriend

RIP Yuhudi Penzel, who has been „pickled at great expense“, according to a mistranslation from the Hebrew in the BBC sitcom Episodes

„Stupid videos might be the international language“: the creators of UK-bound Found Footage Fest interviewed

„An exhibition of technical mastery, with all the stately polish of a Sinatra gig“ – Leo Benedictus’s latest Comedy Gold column, on

16 Answers

;s been with his girlfriend for talks about her in interviews and stuff.

Um, Jimmy. Allen is just…. not that funny, plus gayer than Dale Winton in a pair of Speedos with ‚Bum me now‘ written on them.

He’s either married to a bird, or a got a girlfriend, im not sure which.

But if i didnt know that, i would indeed think he’s gay…… Scrap that – i think he IS gay, just in denial.

It is up to US on Yahoo Answers, to force him out of the closet.

Jimmy <3

no goes out with a very pretty lady called jenny has a son who suffers from …. i dont want to guess cuz i dont really remember but yeah …. he’s pretty much not gay =]

yeah, i think so, omg i love alan carr, he is a l3G3ND

You know I believe he’s married, don’t quote me on that one though.

We need your help …

I emailed Endemol Shine UK about Rachel Riley a few months ago. There response was basically ‘meh not our problem’. This woman went on Victoria Derbyshire and made out she was a victim of AS bullying when she is in fact a bully who associates with Gnasherjew, Sussex Friends of Israel. She bullied and harassed a 16 year old girl and her father to the point where the poor girl was on the verge of taking her own life. She is currently suing Mike Sivier of Vox Political Online for libel, along with Z list actress Tracy Ann Obermann. Mike has never published anything about either of them that was is also behind the Twitter account Stop Funding Fake News which targeted the Canary amongst other pro-Corbyn media sites. It is time that Twitter and Facebook took some responsibility and banned her and her right wing anti-Corbyn followers from their platforms.

Whoever she may be, this Riley person doesn’t seem worthy of such expenditure of words. A nobody whose actions are inconsequential. Don’t give her credence.

She most certainly appears to be Mentally Unstable and in need of help and intervention!

Rachel Riley is a thoroughly unpleasant individual.

As previously mentioned this ghastly tv person is suing Mike Sivier who was a journalist and is now a full time carer for his partner. Money is the key to justice it seems in a Tory world. so Riley and pal Obermann are betting on Mike not being able to fund his defence against this cruel attack upon him. I can only imagine the pressure he is under whilst trying to cope with everyday life. Awful people. I have contributed to his fund for justice I hope others will. Solidarity.

I am sharing this link and wish Mike the best of all luck in this vicious attack on him.

Surely what Rachel Riley is doing is committing the criminal offence of ‘Defamation of Character’, which if proven, carries significant fines and jail time?

It can’t be that hard to prove she has already done major damage to Mike Sivier and Jeremy Corbyn (and others) with HER libellous and Defamatory claims, as she has done so, so very publicly. Her claims can be proven false, and can be proven to be a deliberate attempt to destroy the reputation and livelihood of others with lies.

I suppose it doesn’t help that our Justice system is severely compromised by political interference as in the case of Julian Assange (just one high-profile example of many), but we must make people like Rachel Riley, Boris Johnson, and many others face the Justice we need.

It strikes me that this coming General Election is a major fork-in-the-road for the UK, it’s not just about Brexit, or the NHS, but the very real danger that the likes of Rachel Riley, and their disgusting behaviour will become the permanent norm for life in Britain. We can’t let these lying, traitorous criminals (for that is what they truly are), destroy our country, our democracy, our legal system, our society, and our humanity.

I have donated to Mike Sivier’s crowdjustice campaign, I sincerely hope the Law will punish Rachel Riley heavily and publicly, and help turn the tide on the tsunami of liars we seem to be inundated with, and forced to deal with these days.

I agree with everything said in this comment. Rachel Riley and Tracy Obermann, plus Gnasherjew and the rest of the right wing Twitter miscreants should all be held criminally liable for the upset and misery they have caused and continue to try and cause

The best way to deal with juts like Rachel and her mates is to take the wee wee (I suspect jimmy car may have been behind the ‘gag’ – it’s plausible – she’s a friend of his I think and he is a proper Israel-lover, and Rachel is not really very imaginative or intelligent at all. To the average brit her grooming in simple arithmetic is considered “mathematical genius” but she’s really not at all intelligent, whilst Jimmy Carr, though clearly sadistic, hypersexual, happy to take money from genocidal states, happy to use bankster loopholes but then pretend to be a man of the people, and also there’s a little more I know about him which like Holmes I may hold back permanently, real dirty, him and Pete Doherty both, very very dirty, and Carr is basically a man attached to much low calibre horror. Very low, trust me. So this is really JUST his sort of ‘joke’. He’s not stupid enough to let the public see it, but he’s “clever” enough to make it and has just the right balance of immorality and bravado. If it were him, he has fully convinced his lemming-friend Riley that it is “not racist”, although he knows in his heart it is, whereas she is too stupid to ever realise that (and will carry on like a robot, driving the racist nail deeper into the neoliberal coffin for all history to see). I have no idea if it really was him, not her – maybe it’s just his influence. But she really doesn’t seem (and never has) intelligent enough to me to be able to even write a knock knock joke, let alone try to compete with the private eyes of the world… Carr is the conceited and propaganda-fed fake-elite lowlife, I’d say. But to re-iterate this is PURE SPECULATION based on assessments I have made of Carr and Riley’s media work (not their politics) in the past, plus, as I said, some very low dirt I happen to know about Carr, which technically a few others in the media, many people in London, outside that, are well aware of, but they don’t know it (they don’t know which ‘famous’ name connects the dots or, indeed, what I know about that poor man, a nice guy, that one, too, but also an unfortunate soul… and how he connects Doherty and Carr is where the answer to how low they can limbo goes). (When I told one of Pete Doherty’s minders, who happen to meet me at a location I own, one time, the name and what I knew, the bouncer, the huge built tough bouncer turned very very pale. No. There are things Holmes keeps back for emergencies. Anyway Rachel Riley’s friends sink to some VERY VERY LOW depths if you care to look. She’s no Giles Brandreth, that’s for sure).

So yeah. People like Carr (if he’s guilty of this), and certainly Hislop (publishing ridicule of shamima begum the weeks before her baby died and also the weeks before the terrorist attack on a new zealand mosque), Riley (just a girl giving all white british children a bad name globally), and many of those I have already ripped it out of at my ‘numberwang’ article (read it if you want some inspiration on how to rip it out of these juts) need to have the wee wee well-extracted from them.

Humanity’s intellectuals are LAUGHING AT YOU ALL (ie all outside the west, ALL real intellectuals are laughing at YOU – not me, me they like. i don’t count as one of you, really) and it’s these juts causing it. You have to use that intellect on the juts and extract the wee wee. I will not blackball western intellectuals if they want to apply for membership to the global human “elite” (real, not p.r.-made)

the judiciary is a joke. what value has a judgment from people locking assange up? take it to a higher plain

sufis have taught: a bribe is a substitute for law and law is a substite for justice

real justice is woven into the unfolding of our lives and of history

ridicule this woman so much and so well people are worried that if they watch countdown people will think they are morons… may SLIGHTLY impact countdown’s budget and future

just one further addition to what I said – I did some research and it’s easy to find the name of the person I knew and whom people I knew knew very very well, who connects Doherty to Carr, and Sadowitz is there too – another one linked to it;

a search for ‘corbin’ at this page tells us ALL we need to know about how low sadowitz limbos:

i will only ever share with the world what sherlock holmes would if he knew as much as me about what these people, between them, have clearly (known to authority and judiciary) been involved in!!

just for reference, if any journalists are professionally curious, that is an interesting little story that one.

i’m banned from facebook until just after the election, or i’d share this with you and others there; i won’t be offended if for any reason this is not material you want to keep on your page, then again perhaps there’s no reason. anyway, here is some VERY key info:

Evidence of how far propaganda has penetrated the educated classes (I don’t mean the fact that Rachel Riley has proved my ‘claim’ that twitter and facebook are ‘the last outpost of white stupidity’).

I will return to Bovary later today, but a highly pertinent incident must be reported by me here, shocking and painful, in many ways. I have a neighbour, a decent chap, a few blocks away from me, who is a nice guy, a fairly ‘intelligent’ man, about average for British educated classes, which is really not any different to the uneducated classes although the man I mention would not imagine so I would say, from our conversations, nor the rich gay apparently disgraced-royal I have met walking his dog by the river who told me that most British people without private education are stupid (and he also claimed that Corbyn had had a rent boy assassinated! Yes, he was trying to poison me against Corbyn. A lot of white gay men presume I am gay due to my being single and allegedly attractive and clean and so on – apparently even gay men fall for stereotypes and judge only by their own somewhat peculiarly prejudiced ideas, since I am not in fact gay) (or I’d be a lot richer, eh? Well) (I disappointed the gay man considerably when in response to his claim that Corbyn had had a rent boy killed to silence him and conceal Corbyn’s alleged bisexuality I was ‘impressed’ that Corbyn may be ‘bisexual’ – indicating that he was a far more enigmatic man than I’d been led to believe – although as I have written elsewhere, gay sex is to me in the same category as junk food, for health reasons).

Anyway, so this man, like the gay royal dude I mention, certainly sees himself as better informed and more intelligent than the uneducated or the lowly-educated and he has a senior position with regard to organising the ballot – when I go to place my vote, he has an administrative role, possibly in charge, I got the impression, of organising that room and the people in it, and boxes etc.

We are in Putney, and in 2017’s general election the tories won about 20,000 votes, Labour 19,000 and Lib dems 5,000.

I told the man that for he thought that if the tories lose a few seats the lib dems may win, and I said that Labour were just behind and the Lib dems were MILES behind. He was sure that the lib dems had come in a close second to the tories! This is the man who organises the ballot boxes for this little locality in putney, for my road and those around. And that’s how far propaganda has deluded him. I said I had checked precisely at the time (ie 2017) and was sure, and he said he had too and was sure. LOOK how well propaganda fools people who think they are educated and intelligent.

He also had not heard about the incident involving Kyle Pedley (see references below) or Rachel Riley and her t-shirt based insult, where she insulted all black people and this was justified by her and others as a way to ‘fight anti-semitism’ – yes, to Rachel Riley insulting all black people in the world is just one way to ‘fight against anti-semitism’ – just as to others bombing nations and killing millions of civilians is a way to ‘fight terrorism’ and indeed ‘anti-semitism’.

So I was sad and disappointed partly, when I saw the result when I got home and checked (although not really that sad, as I was one of the 19,000 Labour votes!). I did not manage to check when I was with the guy because sadly a call from a relative came and I had to take it or I could have pointed his error out to him right there, ie proved the case. Maybe he’ll check himself, if not I’ll tell him when I see him next. The good news is it means Labour may well win this time. The Tory who had that 20,000 votes is Greening who has run away and isn’t standing again. Indicating she is scared and Labour will probably win Putney. The neighbour I mention, when I left him, was convinced that anyone can win, and that lib dems had second place at the last election and were very likely to win. That’s how well propaganda has taught you to belittle Corbyn or think less of him or overlook his strength and overlook the people who back him. This man ORGANISES the ballot round here! And that’s how little he knew about the vote, the very vote he is there organising! He’s a nice guy and this document isn’t here to insult him, but the extent propaganda has reached him is an important lesson to you all, particularly to all ‘white’ ‘educated’ Britons and all middle class token ‘educated’ non white Britons who don’t vote Labour, or won’t vote Corbyn, who will ‘vote lib dem’ (aka throwing your vote away whilst voting for nuke-waving racists who think non white skin is ‘funny’, some of them).

Funny how he, and everyone else, has heard of the ‘anti-semitism’ various racists accuse Corbyn and his backers of, despite that being a false accusation, whilst the Pedley incident, which is HORRIFYING (imagine if they had said to a jew – how many times do you go to synagogue?) (Imagine if when out of the room about a jew they said ‘do we need a jew?’ Imagine the news coverage. My friend the ballot man would certainly know about THAT but he had NO IDEA AT ALL about the pedley incident (see below) it was totally news to him. Although when I told him he certainly believed it and digested it, he’s not like the many white men I have met and spoken to who are fucking racists and bitch about muslims and then when I reveal I am one, but I look white you see, which to them means non muslim, they say things like “but you’re different” (yes, I look white).

Tragic. Absolutely tragic. Because it shows how few intelligent white Britons really are as informed and therefore as intelligent as they imagine. As the guy organising the ballot round here you’d think that he wouldn’t be misled into believing Labour didn’t come second, and the Lib dems weren’t hugely beaten – when the results were Tory 20,000, Labour 19,000 and Lib Dem 5,000 – and bear in mind tories had a 10,000 vote lead in the previous election before that, which means Labour caught up and almost won. To then go off imagining that the lib dems almost won and Labour was in third place is called being a victim of white racist propaganda.

The neighbour I mention is a nice guy and I don’t like to write and publish this but given his role in the vote and his education and what his mistake clearly demonstrates to us all, I have a duty to share this info here, because it’s truly shocking. As for Riley’s claims about ‘prioritising’ racism – how come, then, Riley, you brainless pratt, how come nobody’s heard about the Kyle Pedley incident whilst at the same time the pretence of anti-semitism in Labour is clearly exaggerated when you look merely at the case numbers, let alone the facts outlined in the numberwang doc below. How come Riley you brainless pratt, how come when Pedley resigned due to the Islamophobic questions anyone anti-racist knows about now, it received fairly minimal coverage, reach and penetration. And how come nobody has other than myself asked what sort of reaction the press and society would have given if those Tories had asked a jewish candidate the same questions and had behind a jew’s back said “do we really need a jew?” instead of what they said “do we really need an asian?” (behind an asian muslim candidate’s back). No you don’t know what I’m talking about either Riley you white supremacist racist pratt do you? You don’t know about the Pedley incident either do you you racist pratt. Let that be a lesson to all ‘pretty white girls’ – you can look as pretty as you like but if it’s just a mask for white supremacist attitudes and immensely low morals, and a very ‘low calibre’, you may simply look like a hideous diseased cow to anyone who has any moral compass. You can’t conceal your repugnant persona in a slinky dress or behind make up Rachel you utter uttter moronic pratt. Personally I believe Rachel’s Israel-loving friend and tax loop-hole exploiter Jimmy Carr must have been behind the ‘joke’ which insulted all black people and other non white people in the world. Rachel doesn’t really have the capability for creating any form of ‘satire’ – even repugnant and offensive stuff. Maybe I’m wrong but I think Jimmy Carr may be behind that t-shirt, I dunno. If he is, he’s certainly not stupid enough to be seen in public with it, but sadly he has friends who are stupid enough, QED.

(published at tvhobo if you want to see the original)

Rachel who? Eye candy with a primary school skill for arithmetic? Racism is a complex issue, but there is a very simple principle: race doesn’t exist as a biological category. It is a cultural definition imposed on some by others or assumed by some to dominate others. There is one species and the differences between us are minor and peripheral. Just breath in and out of a paper bag for long enough and you’ll pass out. Everybody does. That’s our shared biological inheritance. That’s what Corbyn has been saying all his adult life.

Those who bang on about “antisemitism” in the Labour party are often vertuesignaling racists themselves, whether it’s the likes of Norman Tebbit or MPs (whether Labour, Tory or Fib Dems) who voted for the 2014 immigration act which created the Windrush scandal.

(just one additional doc to share here, explains itself)

For 12 hours I won’t be able to post as Samuel Beckett on Twitter because I called Jimmy Carr a twat for having been one of the macho boorish puerile dickheads who egged on an old friend of some of my friends, a guy I knew briefly, Mark Blanco, not a bad guy but in many ways as much a puerile dick-waving boor as Jimmy Carr, Jerry Sadowitz, Rachel Riley, Katie Hopkins and Boris Johnson – who egged Mark on in his puerility and in the end, somehow, apparently unknown to the public, investigations appeared to reach very absurd conclusions, Mark was killed, or ‘killed himself’, at the home of what the Guardian calls an ‘ex drug dealer’ – crack dealer it appears – who sold crack, for example, to convicted as follows: . So Jimmy Carr can only stand the heat if it’s not switched on. If someone throws any kind of visceral remark back at HIM, he runs away, has them blocked – pretty sad, so Jimbo you only really know how to mock people ‘viscerally’ if they can’t answer back, you can be a bully, not a comedian. Sadly for you TVhobo is here, even if twitter is your bitch, to help me answer you back. Hopefully Mendoza will allow me to leave this for the public to take to your face on her comments page re Rachel Riley’s racism. How come Rachel Riley and Jimmy Carr are such lowlifes? How come Jimmy Carr and the sadisitically racist Jerry Sadowitz (of the Liverpool Epstein theatre) hang around with and back men killed in crack dens? Who knows? Not me. Their personal habits are their own.

One of the points on my twitter wall right now, being seen by far less people because Jimmy Carr feels I have hurt his feelings and needs facebook to protect him from that, is that the ‘anti-semitism’ scandal is actually about white people, not about jews. Let’s get some direct quotes from my wall.

As you can see, Twitter, Jimmy Carr, Rachel Riley, Channel Four – are gutless racists who actually endorse terrorist ideology, as did Dan Hodges, who drive terrorism, who can be given some responsiblity for victims of all terrorist attacks whether the Muslims in New Zealand, whether Londoners, people in Madrid, New York, Paris.

It’s time to quote that Chris Floyd I held back on, leaning towards the Jeffrey St Clair style of editing away from my love of Alex Cockburn and Hunter S Thompson courage.

The above is posted at Chris Floyd’s site/blog, see link in the references below, I ‘apologise’ to Floyd for using the full text of his post this time but then again, maybe that’s the point of his writing it, that people read the whole thing. Anyway, Jimmy Carr you are a gutless racist little child who makes vile jokes and when someone RIDICULES YOU you put your fingers in your ears and tell everyone to ignore them. Pathetic little boy.

You know Jimmy Carr there are people who really enjoy it when I take the piss out of you in public, but you don’t want THEM to get any entertainment. Entertainment is reserved only for those who laugh at YOUR jokes and no one else. Sadly most of those people are racists and juvenile dickheads like Rachel Riley. Or shall we call her Racist Riley? Yes. That seems to fit.

(sorry, previous version of this didn’t post properly, my ‘quoting’ method didn’t mix with your php/cgi/whatever) (here is a version which will work on this form)

For 12 hours I won’t be able to post as Samuel Beckett on Twitter because I called Jimmy Carr a twat for having been one of the macho boorish puerile dickheads who egged on an old friend of some of my friends, a guy I knew briefly, Mark Blanco, not a bad guy but in many ways as much a puerile dick-waving boor as Jimmy Carr, Jerry Sadowitz, Rachel Riley, Katie Hopkins and Boris Johnson – who egged Mark on in his puerility and in the end, somehow, apparently unknown to the public, investigations appeared to reach very absurd conclusions, Mark was killed, or ‘killed himself’, at the home of what the Guardian calls an ‘ex drug dealer’ – crack dealer it appears – who sold crack, for example, to convicted as follows: — Boy George was today sentenced to 15 months in jail for falsely imprisoning a male escort by handcuffing him to a wall and beating him –. So Jimmy Carr can only stand the heat if it’s not switched on. If someone throws any kind of visceral remark back at HIM, he runs away, has them blocked – pretty sad, so Jimbo you only really know how to mock people ‘viscerally’ if they can’t answer back, you can be a bully, not a comedian. Sadly for you TVhobo is here, even if twitter is your bitch, to help me answer you back. Hopefully Mendoza will allow me to leave this for the public to take to your face on her comments page re Rachel Riley’s racism. How come Rachel Riley and Jimmy Carr are such lowlifes? How come Jimmy Carr and the sadisitically racist Jerry Sadowitz (of the Liverpool Epstein theatre) hang around with and back men killed in crack dens? Who knows? Not me. Their personal habits are their own.

One of the points on my twitter wall right now, being seen by far less people because Jimmy Carr feels I have hurt his feelings and needs facebook to protect him from that, is that the ‘anti-semitism’ scandal is actually about white people, not about jews. Let’s get some direct quotes from my wall.

this anti-semitism isn’t about jews. it’s about white people. millions of white islamophobes calling muslims ‘anti-semites’ to ‘justify’ white supremacist racism and abuse of muslims and many others, including women, homosexual people, ‘elites’ being added to list (chomsky says)

so again – it’s about the fact that millions of racist white britons, among whom are a handful of white jewish people, are claiming millions of non white people are ‘racist’ and ‘hate jews’ and it’s okay to ignore them when they say “END WHITE ENTITLEMENT AND RACIAL HIERARCHY”

so again – it’s about the fact that millions of racist white britons, among whom are a handful of white jewish people, are claiming millions of non white people are ‘racist’ and ‘hate jews’ and it’s okay to ignore them when they say “DEAL WITH WHITE RACIAL PREFERENCE”

so again – it’s about the fact that millions of racist white britons, among whom are a handful of white jewish people, are claiming millions of non white people are ‘racist’ and ‘hate jews’ and it’s okay to ignore them when they say “NO MORE RACIAL PROFILING”

so again – it’s about the fact that millions of racist white britons, among whom are a handful of white jewish people, are claiming millions of non white people are ‘racist’ and ‘hate jews’ and it’s okay to ignore them when they say “STOP RACISM IN EMPLOYMENT”

so again – it’s about the fact that millions of racist white britons, among whom are a handful of white jewish people, are claiming millions of non white people are ‘racist’ and ‘hate jews’ and it’s okay to ignore them when they say “DO NOT COMMIT GENOCIDE”

this anti-semitism isn’t about jews. it’s about white people. millions of white islamophobes calling muslims ‘anti-semites’ to ‘justify’ white supremacist racism and abuse of muslims and many others, including women, homosexual people, ‘elites’ being added to list (chomsky says)

incident reminds me of something on tvhobo’s archives, just before charlie hebdo, the massacre, by terrorists, Dan Hodges was telling corbyn off for not celebrating, with bloodlust and drool the way hodges was, the killing of ‘jihadi john’

that happened; hodges wrote what he wrote; i called it out on hobo – i tweeted him. i told him that he was basically praising the ideology of terrorism. i think it was only a day or two later, at most, charlie hebdo happened; people with the same ideology as dan hodges did it

so there really is no excuse for the puerility and juvenility and dickwaving and insulting racism of people like sadowitz and riley. #sackrachelriley

As you can see, Twitter, Jimmy Carr, Rachel Riley, Channel Four – are gutless racists who actually endorse terrorist ideology, as did Dan Hodges, who drive terrorism, who can be given some responsiblity for victims of all terrorist attacks whether the Muslims in New Zealand, whether Londoners, people in Madrid, New York, Paris.

It’s time to quote that Chris Floyd I held back on, leaning towards the Jeffrey St Clair style of editing away from my love of Alex Cockburn and Hunter S Thompson courage.

In response to the mass slaughters this week, the “writer” and “political thinker” David French tweets:

“Few things concentrate the mind more than the terrifying knowledge that a person might want to kill someone you love. It makes you aware of your acute vulnerability. [Here’s] why a criminal who comes to our house will face the business end of an AR-15….

French then links to an article he wrote for National Review — complete with a picture of AR-15s “on sale while supplies last” — which speaks of death threats he’s received. (You will forgive me if I don’t link to the story. It’s not my job to feed the gibbering, moaning shade of William Buckley with the clicks he craves to ease his suffering in the shivering precincts of Hades.)

Upon reading French’s chest-pounding discharge, I then gave what I believe is a reasoned, dispassionate, yea philosophical reply (edited here to eliminate the tweet-breaks):

And what if they come IN blasting with the “business end” of an AR-15? The Dayton guy killed 9 people in 30 seconds, with cops there who had the “business end” of their guns primed to go. God, the sickening faux-toughness of you cringing, rightwing cowards.

And by the way, I grew up in the so-called “real” America — the white rural South — that all you wingers have wet dreams about. And we slept with our goddamned doors unlocked. Why? Because back then there weren’t a million fake tough-guys running around substituting AR-15s for their manhood.

And I’ll tell you something else for nothing. I’ve had death threats ever since I started criticizing YOUR dipshit leader Bush Jr. in print years ago. I get them now from your fellow rightwing fake tough guys. And I wouldn’t have one of your penis-substitutes in my house. Why?

Because I’m not a cringing little coward who would put my own children at risk with deadly weapons in the house just so I can do John Wayne cosplay oiling the “business end” of my AR-15. The “business end” of your oiled metal dildo won’t keep you or your family safe from the gun culture you rightwing dipshits have been pushing for decades. YOU and all your fellow rightwing travellers have flooded the country with guns, even as your extremism — yes, even the “Never-Trumpers” — have pushed violence and hatred at every turn.

You want to protect your family? Then fight against the gun culture, fight against rightwing hatred, fight against the disempowerment and despair you rightwing extremists have advanced for decades, fight against the militarization and brutalization of our whole society which both you and your fellow travellers, the “centrist,” interventionist neoliberal Democrats, have imposed on our collapsing, corroded, corrupted land.

“Business end of an AR-15.” Jesus Christ, aren’t you ashamed before your family to be so damned pathetic?

The above is posted at Chris Floyd’s site/blog, see link in the references below, I ‘apologise’ to Floyd for using the full text of his post this time but then again, maybe that’s the point of his writing it, that people read the whole thing. Anyway, Jimmy Carr you are a gutless racist little child who makes vile jokes and when someone RIDICULES YOU you put your fingers in your ears and tell everyone to ignore them. Pathetic little boy.

You know Jimmy Carr there are people who really enjoy it when I take the piss out of you in public, but you don’t want THEM to get any entertainment. Entertainment is reserved only for those who laugh at YOUR jokes and no one else. Sadly most of those people are racists and juvenile dickheads like Rachel Riley. Or shall we call her Racist Riley? Yes. That seems to fit.

Riley’s tainted history

We don’t have to look very hard to find examples of Riley’s double standards on racism. Her tone-deafness to Black and ethnic-minority concerns is off the charts. In efforts to escalate her anti-Corbyn attacks to ever-higher levels of hyperbole, Riley is willing to invoke the most outrageous comparisons. Seriously, back in July, she compared the Durham Miners’ Gala to a KKK rally:

No intelligent person is suprised by her latest antics. This was her in July.

This act alone is more racially offensive than any word or deed by Jeremy Corbyn. Only someone privileged enough to never face the sort of racist wrath meted out by the KKK could make such an absurd comparison. The marching bands of Durham are unlikely to arrive on Riley’s lawn with a noose and burning torches, for example.

But to Riley and her merry band of hypocrites, they are the permanent priority victims. Despite being wealthy, white and platformed, they presume a deeper understanding and experience of racism than anyone else. And there is no double standard too glaring for them to make with a straight face.

Riley recently promoted the views of an anti-Corbyn heckler – even after he was exposed as sharing racist, homophobia and antisemitic posts in social media:

Here’s Rachel Riley, championing an Islamophobic, anti-Semitic homophobe, because he doesn’t like Jeremy Corbyn.

If her anti-racist credentials weren’t smashed all over the floor already, they surely are now.

— Mike #VoteLabour ? (@mickeyfinnlad) November 13, 2019

So it appears that Richard Cameron – the Church of Scotland minister who heckled Jeremy Corbyn – has a serious problem with Muslims and LGBT people. Just a snapshot of his tweets below.

My thread of the numerous times JC has supported/praised terrorists/invited them to Parliament.

The heckler turning out to be a massive wrongun changes none of this.

Corbyn cheerleaders trying to dismiss the facts because of it is one of the worst ‘woke gotchas’ they’ve tried.

— Rachel Riley ? (@RachelRileyRR) November 14, 2019

The hostile environment

Riley has claimed she’d vote Tory rather than vote for Corbyn. This despite Boris Johnson’s long history of sexist, homophobic and racist remarks. These include referring to gay men as “bumboys”, black people as “picanninnies” with “water-melon smiles”, and Muslim women as “letterboxes”. And that’s before we get to the Tory Islamophobia crisisWindrushGrenfell‘hostile environment’. Oh, and not forgetting how Tory leader of the house Jacob Rees-Mogg once gave an after-dinner speech to white supremacist group Traditional Britain.

Countdown star Rachel Riley would vote Tory after ‚Labour’s anti-Semitism‘

No committed anti-racist would even consider supporting such a party. But in the Rachel Riley Hall of Mirrors, reality itself is inverted. I mean, this is the woman who joked about not looking like “a typical Jew”. What does “a typical Jew” look like, Rachel?

Because she is so stupid it’s very easy for her to make stupid, racist and even antisemitic comments such as ‚I don’t look like a typical Jew‘ and call herself ‚Aryan‘

This rancid behaviour undermines the fight against all forms of racism and helps create a new kind of hostile environment. An environment where the Telegraph runs nonsense like this:

Comparisons between Corbyn and Enoch Powell is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. The stress this must be causing Jewish Corbyn supporters. I’m sorry this happening to you cause this is actually WILD! ?I’m not sure how I’d feel if my community was being used in the way.

— Chardine Taylor Stone (@misschazmatazz) November 20, 2019

This litany of bigotry is far from exhaustive. But at this point, we could fill a book with the misdeeds of Rachel Riley.

A line in the sand

I live life as a gay, working-class woman of colour. And yet Riley regularly attempts to brand me and this outlet as racist. I reject her accusations. Not that she even merits the credibility to make them. Riley (in her own words) passes as white. This is not an option for people like me and countless others who are routinely subjected to racist abuse and discrimination. Yet she fails to acknowledge this privilege, or consider the lived experience of others, when tossing about these allegations like confetti.

To a cynical operator like Riley, the worst thing in the world is to be called a racist. But to an actual anti-racist, the worst thing is being racist.

As anti-racists, we assume there is racism within us. Growing up in a racist society, we will inevitably pick up conscious and unconscious ethnic biases. Our job is to hunt them out, and ditch them. And it’s a lifelong process. It’s the ongoing commitment to that process that makes a person truly anti-racist like, say, Corbyn.

What Riley does is performative anti-racism. She leverages the language of anti-racism purely for political ends. And she repeatedly tramples over the feelings of the LGBTQI+, Black, and Muslim communities. You’ll find she barely mentions antisemitism outside the prism of attacks on the Labour Party. And she actively supports the racist actions of Apartheid Israel. She ain’t no anti-racist, bruv.

Nevertheless, Riley continues to enjoy her minor celebrity status. And her anti-left witch hunt is promoted relentlessly by the media. She is even effectively platformed as an anti-bullying ambassador. We suggest you take a leaf out of the Riley playbook – it’s time for us to draw a line in the sand. It’s time to call out any organisation that promotes the bullshit tsunami that is Rachel Riley.