A pregnant gay man has opened up about his rare pregnancy with his husband’s baby.
Trystan Reese and Biff Chaplow, of Portland, Oregon, spoke about Trystan’s pregnancy with their first biological son.
Speaking on This Morning, the pair explained that unlike most same-sex couples, they were able to conceive a child naturally – as Trystan is transgender.
Mr Reese said: “I think there are a lot of gay couples who would love to have their own biological child without intervention or assistance from other people.
“For me, I see it as a really amazing gift that I’ve been given. I get to live as a man, and I also get to do this really amazing thing that a lot of people would love to do.”
The couple, who have been together for seven years and married for four, first become parents after stepping up to raise their niece and nephew.
They later became convinced that they should try for their own child.
Trystan explained: “I wanted to keep growing our family, and adopting more kids was not something we could do.
“We could afford another child, but that [adoption] process was very emotionally difficult for our family, and we thought, actually, we already have everything we need to grow our family on our own!
“I had to stop taking testosterone – I talked to a medical team and made sure that was advisable. We know this seems unique to your viewers, but in our community we actually know a few transgender men who have the ability to carry a child, and who have done so successfully.
“For us it’s not that groundbreaking. The doctors said, absolutely this is something you can do, there’s no reason you couldn’t have a happy, healthy pregnancy.”
The pair suffered a miscarriage the first time they tried to concieve, but after another attempt Trystan is now 35 weeks pregnant.
“I had an ultrasound this morning, and they told me everything looks like a healthy, happy pregnancy should look.”
“I know it’s not how most babies are carried, and I know it’s not how most men are, but I’d just invite people to expand their ideas a little bit of what it could mean to be a man and to be a father.”
But how do you get pregnant when you’re a lesbian?
Hannah shares the trials and triumphs of her eight year journey to parenthood
Trying for a baby can be a daunting prospect for any couple, but if you’re in a same-sex relationship, there are specific challenges to consider. It’s something Hannah Latham from Bristol knows all too well. She knew she wanted children with her partner Rowena, and was aware the process would be trickier compared to one faced by most heterosexual couples. What she didn’t bank on, however, was it taking eight years and several detours, until she conceived baby Noah, who’s now nearly six.
Hannah says: „At that time, gay parenting was less visible than it is now and less accessible I would say. So our journey was quite long and fraught with various challenges and quite a lot of disappointments. We tried every route that we could think of.“
Whether you’re interested in adopting or would prefer to visit a fertility clinic, there are quite a few ways for lesbians looking to become parents to explore:
Pregnancies more common among lesbian, gay, bisexual youths
(Reuters Health) – Pregnancies are more common among lesbian, gay, bisexual youths than among their heterosexual counterparts, suggests a new study of New York City high school students.
Overall, sexual-minority students who were sexually active were about twice as likely as other students to report becoming pregnant or getting someone pregnant, researchers found.
“The message for me is that these populations are often ignored or assumed to not need information or reproductive care or services and they absolutely do,” said Lisa Lindley, the study’s lead author from George Mason University in Fairfax, Virginia.
Previous studies had found an increased risk of pregnancies among sexual minority youths, but those data were old and mostly collected for girls only.
“I was just curious more than anything to repeat one of the studies that was done to look at teen pregnancy among sexually experienced young people,” Lindley told Reuters Health.
For the new study, reported in the American Journal of Public Health, the researchers used data from nearly 10,000 ethnically and racially diverse New York City high school students from 2005, 2007 and 2009. They included only students who reported having sex with a member of the opposite sex.
Students were identified as a sexual minority if they identified as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or had reported sex with someone of the same sex.
About 85 percent of female students identified as heterosexual and about 90 percent only had male sexual partners. Of the male students, 96 percent identified as heterosexual and 97 percent only had female sexual partners.
About 14 percent of females became pregnant, and about 11 percent of males got someone pregnant.
Overall, about 13 percent of heterosexual females and about 14 percent of females who only had male sexual partners had been pregnant, compared to about 23 percent of lesbian or bisexual females and about 20 percent of girls who had male and female sexual partners.
About 10 percent of heterosexual males and those who only had female sexual partners experienced a pregnancy, compared to about 29 percent of gay or bisexual males and about 38 percent of males with female and male sexual partners.
“What really accounted for most of the risk for the girls was sexual behavior,” Lindley said. “Basically the earlier they initiated intercourse and the more partners they had the more likely they were to become pregnant.”
The survey data also included students’ responses to a question about ever having been forced to have sex against their will.
For boys, behavior also accounted for a significant part of the increased risk, Lindley said. But, “what was different for the boys is if they were ever forced to have sex, they were more likely to cause a pregnancy.”
The researchers point out there are likely other factors that contributed to an increased risk of pregnancy among sexual minority students, such as stigma and discrimination, lack of support resources and fewer connections to family and school.
“Documenting these disparities is the first step toward reaching health equity,” said Brittany Charlton of Harvard Medical School and Boston Children’s Hospital. “Every one of us can help to lessen this burden.”
For example, she told Reuters Health in an email, healthcare providers can become better trained to meet the needs of lesbian, gay and bisexual people. Public health specialists could design more inclusive teen pregnancy programs targeting socially marginalized groups. Teachers can also make sure all students are equipped with comprehensive sex education and knowledge to make healthy decisions.
“Finally, parents can ensure their children are supported and have access to requisite reproductive healthcare,” said Charlton, who researches teen pregnancy among sexual minority youths but was not involved with the current study.
She cautioned that while the new study confirms past findings, it can’t untangle nuances in pregnancy rates between subgroups, such as lesbians compared to bisexual women.
Lindley also cautioned that the new study does not represent all lesbian, gay and bisexual youths – only those who had sex with a person of the opposite sex.
SOURCE: American Journal of Public Health, online May 14, 2015.
Our Standards: The Thomson Reuters Trust Principles.
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Is Rain Brown dating Boyfriend? Is she Pregnant? Or is Alaskan Bush People Rain Gay?
You may now think that Alaskan Bush People Rain is gay. Isn’t it?
Well, it so happens that her status is also wrong when on 1 December 2017, she Instagrammed a photo and captioned the sweet message, she said:
“ No I’m straight. And I call my fans rainbows because my name is Rain, but you do you boo.“
Equality is an important virtue in her lives, according to the little TV star. Therefore, just because she treats this category’s gays, lesbians, and people in a rather beautiful way, it doesn’t imply her sexual orientation is the same as her own.
Concerning Rain Brown’s dating status, the current information about her love life is that she is not dating anyone currently and has no boyfriend as well. She still managed to keep her connection away from the reach of the press. She rarely flaunts social media photos with males but none is them is coming out as a lover. Hence, we can assume she is a single and happy girl
NEW YORK, United States (CMC) — A Caribbean-born major television news anchor here has come out publicly that she is gay and having a baby with a reporter from the same television station.
NBC newscaster Jenna Wolfe, 39, who was born in Jamaica and raised in Haiti, announced that she and the station’s foreign correspondent Stephanie Gosk, 40, have been dating for three years now.
Wolfe, the station’s Sunday Today anchor, whose father grew up in Puerto Rico, said the couple plan to wed and go on „Operation Baby“ in December.
„My girlfriend, Stephanie Gosk, and I are expecting a baby girl the end of August,“ she told reporters here, making the announcement the same week that the US Supreme Court, the highest court in the land, heard arguments in two cases regarding same sex marriage.
„We felt like we wanted to share our adventures with a wide-eyed, little person. The more we talked about it, the better the idea seemed,“ Wolfe said, adding she underwent artificial insemination with an anonymous donor.
„We were constantly on the road, juggling a thousand balls at once. It’s a miracle we got it all together,“ Wolfe said, noting it was significant that she came out publicly.
„This is the most exciting thing that has ever happened to us. But I don’t want to bring my daughter into a world where I’m not comfortable telling everyone who I am and who her mother is.“
Gosk described the announcement as „a spectacular moment for us“.
„The beauty is that we live in a time where there’s no need for secrecy. For a long time, I had feared I would never have a child,“ she added.
More from PinkNews
Biff, who is a cis gay man, said his partner’s anatomy was never a major issue.
He said: “I think the truth is, for all of us in relationships, when we meet somebody that we are attracted to, we are not attracted to every single part of them, necessarily.
“It’s totally possible for me to, say, enjoy hairy chests but be with somebody who does not have a hairy chest.
“That’s how I saw it. It wasn’t a negative thing… there was so much else about him that I loved and was attracted to.”
A man donates sperm to a woman for insemination – it doesn’t matter if she’s single or in a relationship. The donor can be a friend or a private donor found online or through community networks. The process can be performed at home using a needleless syringe (known as home insemination or DIY insemination), or at a fertility clinic.
You can take your own sperm donor to a clinic or they have banks of donor sperm which is protected under the partial anonymity law in the UK (the donor remains anonymous until your child turns 18 at which time your child has the right to trace their sperm donor). If you’re looking into this option, it’s generally advised to go to a licensed clinic where sperm is screened to ensure it’s free from STIs and the woman (or women) are given clear legal rights.
The law changed in 2009 so lesbian couples who are in a civil partnership or marriage at the time of conception are both their child’s legal parents, regardless of how the child was conceived. For those who aren’t married or in a civil partnership, if you conceive through donor insemination at a licensed clinic, both partners will be treated as the child’s legal parents. But, when non-married partners conceive through donor insemination at home, the non-birth mother has no legal parenthood and will have to adopt the child to obtain parental rights.
Typically this happens when a lesbian or heterosexual woman and a gay man team up to have children together, though sexuality is irrelevant. The man will donate sperm to the woman (again either through a licensed clinic or for home insemination), and both parties share responsibility for and custody of their child. If you do decide to co-parent, you won’t have sole custody. Therefore, it’s definitely worth getting legal advice beforehand and spending time talking through how it will work. The details can be tricky, from how costs will be split to where the child lives and the degree of involvement each co-parent will have with the child. But there are also many benefits to co-parenting such as sharing the responsibility, having more support and a larger extended family who loves your child.
Many lesbian couples don’t want to go through the stressful process of insemination or the complications of involving another parent and so the idea of adopting is appealing. Same-sex couples can apply to adopt through a local authority or adoption agency.
Surrogacy happens when another woman has a baby for a couple who can’t have a child themselves. But it’s actually quite rare in the UK. It’s legal here, but no money other than ‚reasonable expenses‘ can be paid to the surrogate. There’s also nothing in the law preventing her keeping the baby after it’s born if she changes her mind. It’s even illegal to advertise for surrogates. Surrogacy is not commonly used by lesbians but is a more common option for gay men who often go abroad where there is legal framework in place or no restrictions.
When Hannah and Rowena started their journey to parenthood nearly 15 years ago, adoption was the first option they really considered. But they soon came up against some frustrating hurdles.
„We had a social worker come to visit. She painted a very negative picture of homophobia within the system and said, „you are potentially going to be faced with only being offered second rate children because you’re seen as a second rate family“.“
Hannah says the social worker also criticised her and her partner’s lifestyles, suggesting they needed a mortgage and she shouldn’t be taking antidepressants (Hannah was on a low dose of citalopram at the time), in order for adoption agencies to take them seriously. But she states that things are very different now. Homophobia has not been entirely eradicated but the system really recognises the positive side of gay people having families.
Put off adoption thanks to the tactless caseworker, Hannah and Rowena tried other routes, from asking friends to donate sperm to insemination at a clinic.
„The idea of having our own children was like a second choice. Neither of us were motivated to do that initially. But obviously, we’ve both got wombs so it’s a possibility. So we approached male friends. One was quite interested. We all got quite excited but he finally decided that he was just a bit too young and wasn’t ready for it,“ reveals Hannah.
So the couple decided donor insemination at a clinic might be a better bet. But this was in April 2005, they were caught out by the law, which had recently changed. Now, when donor-conceived people reach 16 years old, they would be entitled to apply for information about their donor. It meant that much of the sperm stores in banks around the country at that time was essentially defunct because they had been donated under full anonymity laws. Eventually, Hannah found one clinic which would take them on, but it meant travelling all the way to London.
After three unsuccessful tries, at £800 a pop, Rowena and Hannah were feeling disillusioned. The clinic started suggesting IVF, which would take the fees into the thousands, but with Hannah in her early 30s with no known fertility issues the couple felt it was too early to go down this expensive and stressful road. After a fourth insemination, where a faulty plunger caused a nurse to end up with the donor sperm on her face, the couple decided to move on.
They spent many months exploring their options on matching websites – talking to (and in some cases meeting) private donors and gay men interested in co-parenting. Despite feeling desperate to get on with it and use a donor, the couple met a gay couple interested in co-parenting whom they really liked. They spent a year pursuing this possibility – meeting up, discussing how it would work and putting together a detailed contract. After both couples sought legal advice and they were ready to start trying for a child the relationship disintegrated as they all realised they wanted different things.
Frustrated and desperate Hannah went back to the matching sites. She quickly found J*, a gay man who lived near her and Rowena. After STD tests, and drawing up a donor agreement, they were ready to try home insemination. Amazingly, Hannah got pregnant the first time they tried. A few years later, they tried again with another donation from J and Hannah became pregnant with Eli. So now, despite their arduous journey to parenthood, Hannah and Rowena have two sons who are full brothers. They see J every couple of months.
Hannah reckons things are better for lesbian couples now, since laws have changed and same-sex marriage has become available. But LGBT people still face subtle discrimination, sometimes even from within their own community.
„There’s quite a lot of issues around people’s attitude towards what a family should be,“ Hannah explains.
„Throughout my journey, I came across peers within my community who thought gay people shouldn’t have children and I still come across this attitude. But I believe everybody has the right to be a parent and everyone has the potential to be a good parent. The more gay people who have families and are out and proud about it, the better. And we need to educate ourselves about and challenge the microagressions that come from all directions, especially from within our own community.“
Three years ago, to challenge those negative assumptions and help LGBT families (or those wanting to start trying) feel less isolated, Hannah started We Are Family, a magazine to help demystify the steps to family life for LGBT couples. She’s come to think of it as her third child. The publication and website exists to support the LGBT community through their parenting journeys and celebrate stories of LGBT people becoming parents when their options were limited.
Hannah says: „I think a lot of LGBT people who want to start families just go down one route and they don’t necessarily consider all their options. There are actually a lot out there and you might find the one you start with is not the one you end up using. There’s some amazingly positive ways to start families and the LGBT community are paving the way for alternative parenting.“